Repost – Brene Brown quotes

I ran across Brené Brown some time this past year.  It’s quite possible that I was slightly hung over and couldn’t sleep.  I’m not saying that is exactly what happened, but it’s possible.  Despite how I ran across this video, it was incredibly enlightening.

So imagine my excitement when a friend posted this quote on my wall:

7. You need at least one friend who will help you move a body. No judgment. There in a second. No explanation.

I had just watched the first season of Downton Abby.  I immediately thought of the scene where the eldest daughter, mother and maid carry the eldest daughter’s dead Turkish lover back to his room to avoid scandal.  So for a second, I thought of that when I read that quote, but how could my friend know I had just watched this.  So I thought why not google it?  Up pops up a Pioneer Woman entry on quotes from Brené Brown.  Below is the post from Kristen Chase writing on the Pioneer Woman site.  I particularly like #6 & 8.  What are your favorites?

By Kristen Chase.

If your Facebook feed is like mine, it’s overrun by quotes. So is my Twitter feed.

And I admit that I’m generally not a fan of them, because in a way, I feel as though the time you’re taking to post, comment, and like a quote, you could be applying it to your life.

Although, maybe that’s the first step.

Well, this past weekend, I heard Brené Brown speak at Mom 2.0 Summit, and I found myself typing quote after quote as a draft email, even *gasp* tweeting a few because they were that good.

If you’re not familiar with Brené, she’s a researcher, speaker, and author of “The Gifts of Imperfection.”

And I can tell you after listening to her, I’m inspired. Not just as a homeschooler, but as a parent and a person.

So I scoured the #mom2summit hashtag on Twitter and rounded up 25 of her quotes to share with you. I hope you love them as much as I do.

1. We need to change what we say and what we allow to be said in front of us.

2. There are infinite numbers of do overs for your teen girls.

3. The most powerful teaching moments are the ones where you screw up.

4. Do you light up when your kids are coming in the room or do you become the instant critic?

5. If we own the story then we can write the ending.

6. Every time you watch the Jersey Shore, a book commits suicide.

7. You need at least one friend who will help you move a body. No judgment. There in a second. No explanation.

8. Midlife: when the Universe grabs your shoulders and tells you “I’m not f-ing around, use the gifts you were given.”

9. We have to be women we want our daughters to be.

10. Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.

11. It’s no longer a question of can I do it. It’s a question of: Do I want to do it?

12. There’s nothing more daring than showing up, putting ourselves out there and letting ourselves be seen.

13. In our moments of most intense joy, we realize how vulnerable we are.

14. You either walk inside your story and own it or you stand outside your story & hustle for your worthiness.

15. What would you be glad that you did…. EVEN if you failed?

16. We are sick and tired of being sick and tired.. Definition of courage: Tell your story with all your heart.

17. We cannot give our children what we don’t have.

18. You are imperfect & you are wired for struggle; but you are worthy of love & belonging.

19. Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage.

20. Talk about your failures without apologizing.

21. It’s not about “what can I accomplish?” but “what do I want to accomplish?” Paradigm shift.

22. Think about what’s pleasurable, not just what’s possible.

23. Those who have a strong sense of love and belonging have the courage to be imperfect.

24. You can’t dress rehearse the bad moments.

25. Want to be happy? Stop trying to be perfect.

Less is More

One of the most important lessons I learned is that I’m not quite the minimalist I thought I was.  As I browse through issues of Dwell magazine or visit our local Ikea, I’m inspired by the small footprints, how clean and spacious everything looks.  Of course I realize that it’s clean and spacious because of the photo shoot, but nonetheless I envy the open space resulting from the lack of clutter, of excess stuff.  But I struggle with creating less.  I have a set of 12 clear salad plates that I just know I will need one day when I host that fabulous garden party featuring delightful salads, tea sandwiches and petit fours.  Or not.  Because the truth is, I have never hosted a garden party before now and probably wouldn’t in the future.  If I dared mention a garden party, I’m pretty sure my husband’s blood pressure would jump given the disastrous state of our backyard.  Then of course there’s the small detail of patio furniture.  I’m not sure how garden parties work, but I think you have to provide some sort of seating.  The closest thing we have to seating is leaning up against a tree or the side of the house.

The kitchen isn’t my only area of excess and clutter.  There’s the other stuff like clothing or shoes.  Wait, let’s not talk about shoes, that may be taking it a bit too far, right?  Let’s focus on other areas of the house like my daughter’s room.  Does she really need that many stuffed animals?  Where did she learn to hoard?  Why does she think she needs more Barbies?  It’s not like we haven’t already bought her enough to man a small army.  Oh wait, we bought them….We were the ones that bought her every Disney princess Barbie and have bought stuffed animal upon stuffed animal because they’re, well, “so fluffy”.

I can’t even begin to fathom what it would look like for us to move into a smaller house.  Our house is just shy of 1500 square feet which means it’s tiny by Texas standards.  So when I saw the video below I was simultaneously inspired and freaked. 

 

Pair down even more?  Didn’t I just donate two bags of clothing or sell the 2 extra sets of dinnerware I didn’t use last year?  Could I really do more with less?  Is it even possible to eliminate some of the excess in my daughter’s room without traumatizing her or starting World War 3?  I don’t know but I think it has to be done.  Maybe I should start small.  Get rid of those clear salad plates.  What about you?  Is there any stuff you can edit from your life – not people, stuff?

For the love of running

Recently I was reading in Donald Miller’s book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years the notion that a character in a story doesn’t make the choice to change, but instead has to be forced to change.

My husband and I signed up for a 5K run – forcing ourselves to change. We were going to bed every night with the pledge that we would wake up at the crack of dawn to workout. Of course when the alarm went off every morning, we chose sleep.  Even when my husband chose the workout, I still chose sleep.  Soon we stopped setting the alarm. So we signed up for a 5K.  What better way to force you to work out than to sign up for a race, right?  I think the best part about the race is that we signed up with the race a month away thinking 3 miles would be no biggie.  HA!

Signing up was at once both a good and bad thing.

Good

1. The Water is Basic 5K is a worthy cause.  The Water is Basic goal is to drill a thriving, clean water well for every village in Sudan.  I take water for granted because I don’t have to walk 3 miles to get it so I let it run when I’m brushing my teeth or when I step away from the sink.

2.  I needed something to propel me back into a healthy lifestyle.  The thought is that my body will feel better in the long run.  It was the jumpstart to get the wheels in motion.  Because of my competitive nature, I usually need a little something to inspire me to move even if in this case it’s not so much winning the race as it is not looking bad.  Motivation is motivation people.

Bad

1.  I can’t feel my legs today after 100 squats Saturday and a 2 mile run Sunday. I can’t help but wonder if there’s a 3K version?  This will eventually go away, right?

2.  I’m freakishly mean when I’m out of shape and trying to run. While trying to explain that I had messed up the timer during Sunday’s run, my husband dared ask me a clarifying question.  I let out a low scream. Needless to say he ran ahead and stopped asking me questions until we were no longer running. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened. The same thing happened several years ago during a race. I had outpaced myself because I was feeling claustrophobic with all the other runners around me. We were less than half a mile from the finish line and I was moaning and groaning about longest run ever. My husband trying to cover my pessimism says, “We’re so close. Almost done. I can see the finish line. Can you see the finish line?” I think my head spun around a few times and green puke flew out before I yelled out “NO, I CAN’T SEE THE FINISH LINE.” To which, of course, two seconds later I could see the finish line.

3.  Hills kill me and somehow when running, there is always some sort of hill involved. I used to consider myself unashamedly the Lance Armstrong of hills. Don’t tell him I said that.  It’s not like I won any races or became famous, but what I lacked in speed I made up for in my ability to run a hill. Those days are gone. Today when going up the hill, all I could think was if my husband even dares to hand off the jogging stroller to me before we go up this hill, I will hurt him. I’m not sure how, but I will.

So here we are again, running. I feel better when it’s done, but desperately wish I had not stopped my workout regime for the past 6 months. Of course, I also wish that those entire packages of chips ahoy cookies and massive amounts of Dr. Pepper weren’t riding on my thighs at this moment. I used to lengthen my stride to make it through a run. Now all I can think of is when do we stop.

Today’s Obsession … External Hard Drive

That’s right I’m obsessed with a nondescript piece of technology.  It’s not Apple, it doesn’t talk or do anything fancy, but it does hold valuable information. 

This is why I can’t muster up the wherewithal to post something fun or creative.  It’s because I’m totally obsessed with making sure my new hard drive is good to go. 

Why the obsession?  I could preach to you about the importance of always saving your work and backing up your information, but the real reason is because I paid dearly to recover a hard drive 3 years ago.  It was like throwing several hundred dollars into a fire.  I cried a little.  And more than the monetary loss, I was freaking out that I would have to find a way to somehow reload the insane amount of music my husband and I own.  Not to mention how do you turn back time to retake pictures?

Another great reason is because it is quite possible and not totally a dirty rumor that I have indeed fried THREE, that’s right THREE, external hard drives.  Who knows why, it just happens and it’s scary (see previous paragraph).

Did you know that you can get A-TON-O storage space in something that will fit in the palm of your hand?  Technology wows me.  How do they do that?  No really, how?

So, because I’m quite often easily wowed, I purchase a back up external hard drive for my current external hard drive.  You can never be too safe!  It fits in my hand just like I said before and it has A-TON-O storage.  Winning.

But now I have to move everything over to said new hard drive.  It should be simple, but though technology is amazing and wows me, I somehow find ways to complicate things.  Let’s just say that my folders are all out of whack and I can’t update any iPods or iPhones until I sort this out.  I know, it’s amazing that I survive without updating my phone.

PS.  Let’s not talk about “The Cloud”, there’s not enough storage space in the heavens for me or at least it’s not currently an option.

Spring is just around the corner….

It’s time to pull out the Caftans.  Or not.

There are things in life that I love.  Unconventional things.  Things that are not really meant for me, but I wish they were.  Caftans are on this list.  Not so much unconventional as they are unflattering.  Although, rethinking it, they are slightly unconventional.  I’m pretty sure that with that amount of fabric, you’re bound to get caught in a door, snagged on a hook or dragged down by a toddler or pet.  How much fun is it to grab on to mommy’s excess fabric on her clothes?  Apparently lots of fun. 

But it’s so hard to not want a Caftan when I see a picture like this… In case you have NO idea what I’m talking about when I say Caftan – it’s the second from the left and the last one on the right.

Look how happy they look in their flowy, totally unflattering but incredibly girlie and comfy Caftans.  I’m pretty sure it could also be categorized as a man repeller outfit.  That’s right ladies, unless you plan on wearing your Caftan over an itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny bikini and shed said Caftan in the two seconds after your man spots you, your man is sure to be repelled.  Don’t even think that belting it will somehow give you an amazing silhoutte.  But I really want one.

Then the other thing that comes to mind is retired hollywood stars.  I don’t know why, but I picture the likes of Zsa Zsa Gabor wearing these Caftans.  Vintage is the new black, right?!?  Retired Hollywood stars are vintage, right?  I could totally pull this off?  Forget what I said about not belting it.  Belt it and add bangles for good measure!  Lots of bangles.

Or maybe I should just try to find some similar patterns in a more flattering dress style. 

Or just be unconventional and wear my Warby Parkers to boot.  And burn some patchouli.

Why ESPN, Why?

Leave it to ESPN to produce a tear-jerker.  Why?  Why do you feel the need to inspire me?  To make me try harder?  Is it really necessary?  Can’t you just leave me be, instead of making me rethink how I live my daily life? 

On a more serious note, what a great story. 

ESPN: The Finish Line 2 – Short Feature from Evolve Digital Cinema / IMG on Vimeo.

Lessons I learned this Holiday Season

This season certainly did not pass without a few lessons learned.

1.  I am a terrible cookie decorator.  It could be that I don’t have a steady hand – hence the crime scene outline instead of a gingerbread man.

Not to mention by the time I’ve made the cookie dough, rolled it out, cut shapes and baked it, I’m tired.  Who wants to decorate?  If only the frosting/sugar cookie combo wasn’t so delicious.

2.  This is not new, but I was reminded that I think big, some might even say I overcommit.  This of course is not bad, but I usually underestimate  what it takes to execute.  Instead of spending $150 on a Barbie house that I would one day end up selling for$5, I though I would make one out of white cardboard boxes.  My imagination is much more awesome than reality.  I mean it’s not all bad once you add twinkling lights, some furniture and close one eye.  Right?

3.  Time flies.  Just when you thought you were ahead of the game, it’s one week before Christmas and the Barbie house you started is not even a third of the way done.  Don’t be fooled you are never ahead of the game during the Holiday Season.  Even when you are ahead, something always comes up.  Or in my case, you just think you are ahead.

4.  Whatever I try to accomplish that I don’t want my child to be privy to means that I will get zero sleep during the month of December.  The child that in November was falling asleep around 8 would not fall asleep until at least 9:30.  Everything has to come out of hiding which means you have begun building a Barbie house or wrapping presents at 10:00.  Zero sleep.

5.  The Holiday Season is a much magic as it is about a miracle.  It’s fun and merry but also hopeful and mysterious.

6.  If you want to surprise your husband with a Christmas gift don’t use the Amazon account you share.  It was Amazon Prime people.  What was I supposed to do?  Pass up the two-day shipping?

7.  The Holiday season inspires all sorts of madness.  I mean what sane person decides to bake 3 different types of cookies on Christmas Eve?  And if that weren’t enough, what sane person then decides to go to Wal-Mart to get ingredients for said cookies.  Madness.  Holiday cookie madness.

8.  Kids will survive on a couple of gifts instead of many.  It’s not that my child didn’t want a hundred gifts.  Every single toy in the Target and Wal-Mart circular was highlighted and circled.  Twice.  Parenting is a funny thing.  You want to buy your kid the world, to not go without, but then you have brief glimpses of what life will be like with a child who never went without and it’s not pretty.  But guilt steps in.  You are depriving your child of those fabulous plastic toys  he/she has always wanted.  Then fear joins in.  What if they never forgive you just like you see in all the movies?  Scarred for life, destined for a life of drugs and dead-end jobs or worse living in their old room at the age of 36 with no future in sight?  Insert silent scream.  Just when you pull out your credit card to buy everything in the store, sanity hits you.  It’s ok to not have it all.  To go without that nth toy, because the reality is you are lucky.  My child will probably be ok with just one gift instead of 10.  Or I just need to be ok with it.  And maybe just maybe, instead, it would be better to share our good fortune with others instead of keeping it to myself.

 

Repost – Apparently you have no excuse….

WOW.  This repost was great and thought I would share.  If you’re thinking about doing ANYTHING that you aren’t already doing or you just need some additional inspiration…

Thanks to Chris Brogan – I don’t know you, but thanks for having Tommy Walker guest post on your blog.  Thanks to Jake Thompson – I do know you.  Thanks for posting this on your blog.

106 Excuses That Prevent You From Ever Becoming Great

The following is a rare guest post, this time coming from Tommy Walker. Tommy is an online marketing strategist. If your customer’s aren’t absolutely enthusiastic about what you do, chances are you’re boring them to death. He’s the principal at Tommy.ismy.name and is currently educating freelancers and entrepreneurs on how to sell in higher paying markets.

Be honest. How often do you sabotage yourself?

On any given day, you have tasks you’d like to finish because you know they’d positively impact your business, and tasks you actually do.

You trick yourself into thinking that keeping up with industry news, and reading the latest “10 tips to ______” post is “working”.

You know better, but some part of you believes that simply reading the article will help you move forward.

That having a deep understanding of all things online marketing will better position you when the time is right. When that time comes, you’ll be the supreme ruler of the internet, because you’re so well studied.

But that time doesn’t come.

Something is holding you back, and you can’t quite put your finger on it. So instead of moving past it and taking action, you make an excuse. You justify your reasons for staying put.

You may have one excuse; you may have several.

What follows are 106 of the most common excuses you might tell yourself.

You don’t have the knowledge.

There’s one word kicks this excuse right in the teeth.

“Google.”

If you can’t find a ton of free information on Google, find a book on Amazon.If Amazon doesn’t work, hire a coach.

Information is more accessible now than any other point in history, and most of it is free.

Spend time to find it.

Commit to learning it. Be equipped to tackle your challenge.

You can’t get the education required.

Maybe you don’t have internet, not everyone does (how are you reading this?)

In any case, there are these buildings with a number of books on a variety of subjects called libraries.

They’ll be thrilled to see you, and eager to help.

If you invest the time, a near college level education awaits you.

No it’s not as convenient as the internet, but learning anything worthwhile is seldom easy.

Also reading books will help to fortify your attention span, which is vital to your success.

You don’t know the right people

Like education, people are more accessible than ever before.

Nearly anyone you need to know can be found on Twitter, Facebook, or Linkedin.

Be on a mission they can’t resist being a part of, and you’re half way there.

With a little patience, and an awesome personality, you can connect with the right people.

It won’t happen overnight, but it certainly will happen if you want it bad enough.

You don’t have the money

Finances are a sensitive issue.

You might not have the money right now, but there are plenty of ways to increase your income.

If you have to scour freelancer sites to acquire a hundred dollars here and there, do it.

Any money you make freelancing, save it to put towards your dream project.

Can’t afford to do that?

Create a strict budget, and set aside a portion of your income.

Don’t believe what the news tells you, money is everywhere, and people spend it every day.

Right now, someone is hiring someone just like you.

You can’t afford to take a risk right now.

If not now, then when?

This excuse is fear of the unknown.

The reality is, you can’t afford not to take a risk right now.

If an idea really benefits people, pulling on the reigns doesn’t just inhibit your progress…it prevents people from improving their lives.

It’s too hard.

Anything worth doing is hard.

When was the last time “easy” had a huge payoff for you?

You don’t learn that way.

Babies all learn the same way, trial and error.

They try, fail, and try again until it becomes second nature.

Anyone with an infant learning to stand, walk, or crawl right now will tell you their kid won’t stop, regardless of the number of times they fall on their face.

Babies don’t get the luxury of learning via webinar, audio, or having the process of written out.

They see others do it, and try it themselves.

As a former baby, I can say being receptive to any and all learning will greatly improve your ability to do anything you want.

Someone else is already doing it.

Which came first, Copyblogger or Problogger? Dyson or Hoover? Groupon or LivingSocial?

Does it matter?

Not really.

You don’t know where to begin.

The human brain isn’t designed to process information in a linear fashion.

This is why when you dream, it doesn’t start “at the beginning” and you only remember how the dream ended, but never how it began.

If you’re looking to pick up a new skill, usually “the beginning” will make itself apparent, regardless of where you start.

Even better, because the way you process information is unique to you, your “starting point” could help you form a very unique perspective that people love.

Also consider the other people who “don’t know where to begin.”

By simply picking a place and chronicling your journey, you can inspire others to learn with you.

You’re afraid of what your customers will think.

It’s true, some changes should be gradual.

But if you a drastic change is what you need, your customers are probably already bored and looking for alternatives.

Do you think Apple feared their customer’s opinions before entering the Mp3 player market?

Didn’t think so.

You’re afraid of what your colleagues will say.

Peer validation is rarely the deciding factor in any entrepreneurial story worth hearing.

If you’re concerned with what your industry peers will think, don’t worry about it.

Sometimes disruption is exactly what your peers need.

Nobody will buy.

If people will buy the “Pet Rock” people will buy what you’re selling.

You just have to figure out how to position yourself, and why they need you.

Nobody will care.

You’re right, nobody will care, IF you’re doing something for the wrong reasons.

Are you creating a product because you need the cash?

Nobody will care.

Are you promoting others simply to make yourself look good.

Nobody will care.

Are you sucking up to big names so they will promote your stuff?

Nobody will care.

Authenticity can’t be faked, and selfish motivations can be sniffed out from a mile away.

Be on a mission to make an impact.

Somebody will care, because they share your mission.

Now it’s up to you to find them.

Better to be safe than sorry.

Imagine waking up tomorrow on the verge of death.

All your life you played it safe.

You stayed at your job, and did what you were told.

Sure you got promotions, but at your peak you still only made $60,000.

You had ideas, and watched them came to fruition… at the hands of someone else.

They created memorable products; you’re on your deathbed with nothing to show.

You’re unsure how you’ll pay for your funeral. You’re leaving behind a mound of debt, and you never figured out how to just get ahead.

Feel sorry yet?

There’s no politically correct way to present the information.

Realistically, that’s ok.

If people like Naomi Dunford and Johnny Truant are allowed to play, so can you.

Politically correctness isn’t always the most effective form of communication.

Sometimes the non PC person is exactly the breath of fresh air the world needs.

People aren’t ready to hear this.

It’s true, not everyone is ready to hear everything.

But if you’ve thought it, chances are you are not alone.

If you believe in it enough, one person at a time, you can build a following.

Truthfully, it’s usually the things people aren’t ready for that make the biggest impact on the world.

You can’t question the authority.

Nations were founded on questioning the authority.

Countless Rock stars, celebrities, and political leaders made their mark by disrupting the establishment.

If you start a business to free yourself, then dare not oppose the “powers that be”, you undermine the very spirit of entrepreneurship.

Question the authority! Break the rules!

Just make sure you have evidence to support your claims, otherwise you’re just being a punk, and not in the cool way.

You haven’t done it before.

This is my favorite excuse, because it’s such a cop out.

Let’s look at some of the common milestones in your life that you got through just fine

  • You went to school (hadn’t done that before)
  • Had your first kiss (hadn’t done that before)
  • Learned to drive a car
  • Took up a new hobby
  • Learned to read

Or really anything beyond lying on your back and flailing your limbs uncontrollably.

You hadn’t done anything before you did it. It’s simple, but it’s true.

This excuse is rooted in fear of the unknown.

Now it’s perfectly fine to be afraid, but “inexperience” is by far one of the worst excuses.

Life is built on a series of “firsts” and making the choice to limit your experiences only leads to dissatisfaction.

You’re not that good.

There are plenty of things people aren’t good at.

Either;

A.) Learn and get better or

B.) Find someone who is good and have them fill that role.

You don’t have to do everything alone. The best joint venture projects are simply two people with complimentary strengths.

So if you’re not that good, get better, or find someone who is.

You don’t have anything nice to say.

Just like challenging the authority, being brash is sometimes exactly what people need.

Too many people try to “do it right”, so do it wrong just to stand out.

There are plenty of people who make a career out of saying the wrong thing.

Just make sure there’s substance behind your message.

Other people are more lucky.

Pure “luck” is a myth.

If someone is “lucky” they are doing stuff behind the scenes you’re not seeing.

Taking action and simply doing something instead of making excuses will do wonders for your “luck”.

Besides, other’s luck doesn’t directly impact you.

You can’t, you were raised differently.

Obviously, follow your moral compass. Going against that isn’t what I’m suggesting.

What I will suggest is to seek alternatives that don’t oppose your belief systems.

If a company like Hebrew National can make kosher hotdogs, you can find a way to do what’s holding you back.

But if you’re using this excuse to stay in your comfort zone, I need to ask, “How much are you holding yourself back in the name of something else?”

Your gender won’t let you.

Gender roles are increasingly less relevant.

There have been women CEOs and male nurses for years. Men can start a daycare and women can start a design firm.

Blaming your gender simultaneously speaks poorly for your gender, and empowers those who refuse to fit a mold.

Your kids won’t let you.

No doubt, balancing kids with business is tough.

At the time of this writing, I’m a newlywed with an 11 month old son, my own business, and a new house. It’s a balancing act, but it’s doable.

It requires discipline and maximum use of “productive time”.

At the end of the day you may feel shattered.

Keep it up, you’ll build endurance.

It doesn’t just make you a better business person; it allows you to enjoy family time that much more.

Your spouse won’t let you.

Now I’m not one to give marital advice, and you have to respect your spouse, but open communication can go a long way.

It’s important to communicate your passion. Get to the core of why it’s important to you and really open up.

Be willing to have multiple conversations about it, and really hear their reservations.

Come up plan for”worst possible scenario” together and keep your spouse informed on your progress.

Be prepared to let go of some ideas.

But dig deep into the important ideas, it’s a lot better than “Honey, can we do this…?”

Your parents won’t let you.

really? How old are you?

Ok, regardless of age, people have complicated families, I get it.

Sometimes parents aren’t as rational, or supportive, or open to new ideas as we’d like them to be.

This is no reason to sacrifice your success and happiness.

If your parents require you to show your respect by giving up on your dreams, then maybe you need to weigh the consequences of giving up versus going your own way. (Hint: we each only get one life, and this one is yours.)

Your disability won’t let you.

Josh Blue is a hilarious stand up comic with cerebral palsy, which most noticeably affects his right arm.

Nick Vujicic is a world-renowned preacher and motivational speaker who doesn’t have any arms or legs.

Kyle Maynard doesn’t have arms or legs either, and is a wrestler, MMA fighter, owner of a gym, a student, and a motivational speaker. Oh, and he’s 25 years old.

I’m 25 and have a rare brain condition, and I’m supporting my family and growing my business.

There are artists who create with their mouths, runners who win races on artificial legs, brilliant writers who’s fingers never touch the keyboard and a host of successful individuals with learning, cognitive, and emotional disabilities who refuse to let their situation hold them back.

Need inspiration? Check out The Badass Project at the website and on Facebook to learn about individuals who refuse to let their “disability” hold them back.

[Industry leader] says it won’t work because…

…because they haven’t found a way to make it work yet. Honestly.

Google was a search engine with a silly name back when we were using Lycos or Ask.com.

But they learned, grew, and evolved into something that has completely astounded us.

It’s weird to think that at one point industry leaders said Google wouldn’t work, isn’t it?

It’s not financially sound.

I would never encourage you to gamble, but it’s rarely financially sound to strike out on your own.

Maybe you’re afraid that once you’re a Big Name and the money is rolling in, that you will get a few good years out of it before eventually fizzling out.

Do you realize that’s a possibility regardless?

There’s no R.O.I

R.O.I is one of those funny acronyms people throw around without fully understanding it’s meaning.

To fully measure your R.O.I you need more funny acronyms called K.P.I’s (Key Performance Indicators).

These metrics help you gauge whether whatever you’re doing is working or not. Common K.P.I’s are more comments, more sales, increased traffic, and higher conversions. Each K.P.I is measured individually, and the number of factors that influence a Key Performance Indicator should be controlled to make testing easier.

Not having a Return On Investment is a perfectly sound reason not to do something. Just make sure you are using the term properly, and really looking at the whole picture before you pull that card.

The market conditions aren’t right.

This one is tricky, because there are two schools of thought.

A.) Market conditions don’t really matter, just do it better than everyone else (Apple iPod)

B.) Market conditions are everything.

Not surprisingly there are also two types of people in the world. People who have money, and people who don’t. If the market conditions aren’t right for marketing to the people who don’t have money, create an offer and market to the people who do.

Don’t let your business fall victim to only one portion of the market.

You’ll never get the right exposure.

Teenage pop stars are breaking into the cutthroat entertainment business via MySpace and YouTube.

If your exposure isn’t handed to you by the merit of your work, create your own opportunities using the tools available to you.

There’s no point.

Not with that attitude, there isn’t.

The point is that you’re helping people. The point is that you’re doing something. The point is you’re being productive and taking action.

The point is you’re not living in premature self defeat. You are taking an idea from concept to actualization.

You’re bringing your ideas to the world.

Even if no one sees it, you can have the satisfaction of knowing you did something you believed in.

It’s not important enough.

If it at some point you believed there was a need, there probably is.

Does it take too much to do it? Is it not convenient?

Is it important enough to let it keep creeping up and nagging at you?

Just do it already.

You’ll get to it later.

No you won’t. You never do.

Get to it now, or at least schedule it to get done.

Then do it.

You’ll be a lot more satisfied when you’re finished.

You don’t want to be boring.

What’s boring to some is addictive to others.

People process information differently. If you skew towards boring it’s entirely possible to still find the right audience.

However if you skew towards boring, and you don’t want to, find ways to become more interesting.

Take an improv class, do some live Q&A’s, go bungee jumping… spice it up.

If you can’t get it right the first time, why bother trying?

Perfection is a myth.

Nobody actually “does it right”. That’s why there are so many grocery stores, soda brands, religions, and blogs.

It’s not about “doing it right” so much as it is doing it to the best of your ability.

Giving it everything you’ve got, regardless of the outcome, that’s the only way to do it right.

You’re not ready for that level of success.

This is my personal favorite, and one I’ve used on multiple occasions.

If you say it, it’s true, you’re not ready for that level of success… right now.

Success is an iterative process, every step leads to the next step.

Every “Overnight success” will tell you the path to success was long, winding, and full of obstacles.

By the time you’re an “Overnight success”, you will have endured so much, overcoming challenges will be second nature.

Only one thing is guaranteed, it doesn’t actually happen overnight.

If you succeed, people’s expectations will change.

They absolutely will, and they should.

If you’re positioning yourself as someone who changes lives, expect to play recurring role in the lives you’ve changed.

When you rise up to meet great expectations, you become great.

Of course, you have to manage expectations too. You can’t do everything all the time.

Push yourself to be more but never at the expense of what is most important to you.

If you succeed, my responsibilities will change.

Not only to your customers, but to your personal life as well.

This isn’t a bad thing.

New responsibilities that improve people’s lives is a good thing.

Remember, it comes incrementally. It’s up to decide when to say yes and when to say no.

But don’t not do something because you don’t think you can handle the responsibility.

Give it a shot.

If it doesn’t work, be responsible to enough to find a suitable replacement.

You don’t like what success did to _______

You’re not them.

View their story as a cautionary tale.

If you see where they went wrong, you can do it differently.

There are learning experiences everywhere, and seeing someone lose their way can be one of the best.

You fear what you might become.

This excuse is a little deeper.

For some, success can unleash some pretty nasty inner demons.

Proceed carefully.

Watch for the signs, and ask loved ones to keep you grounded.

For some, myself included, success can go the your head real quick.

Being reminded to do the dishes, taking out the trash, or cook dinner go a long way for me.

Remembering success in business doesn’t mean I’m above menial chores keeps me grounded.

Take it a step further and volunteer for a soup kitchen, or an animal shelter to disconnect from any superiority complex you might develop.

Help people without judgement and watch as they enjoy the person you become.

Failure would destroy you.

Anyone who’s ever “made it” will tell you they’ve failed more times than they’ve succeeded.

Being destroyed by failure is a choice; the choice is to quit.

If you fail, fail.

Give it everything you’ve got, and let it become a disaster.

Watch it burn.Let it destroy you.

Then recoup, learn from your mistakes, and rise from the ashes.

Failure never completely destroys you, only the parts that weren’t doing you any good.

With every catastrophic failure, hindsight allows you to see where you went wrong.

When you rebuild, you’re that much closer to perfecting the system.

You’re afraid of being a 1 trick pony.

This is one I’ve used many times.

It is possible to be a 1 trick pony, if you don’t strive to dig deeper.

Your messaging has more substance than it’s surface meaning. Draw inspiration from yourself.

Read old blog posts, listen to old interviews, dig for deeper meaning.

Don’t just look for what works, explore why it works, and contemplate the reasons why.

Soon you’ll be digging into the psychology of your customers, and creating content that resonates on levels you could have never imagined.

You can’t commit right now.

Fair enough, you have a lot on your plate.

But when can you commit?

Don’t use this excuse to push something aside, if you don’t want to invest the time.

If it’s genuinely interesting, look at your calendar and ask “when can I commit?” and put yourself on a productive path.

And if you don’t want to do it, be honest and admit you’re not interested.

People will always respect honesty over being strung along.

You have too many things on your plate.

See above.

You can’t commit until you’ve seen all the steps.

The road map to successful outcomes isn’t always available.

Granted, sometimes all of the steps are necessary.

More often than not, this excuse is to avoid risk.

If you’re presented with a coherent process that makes sense to you, and you still say no…then what?

Do you really need a formal business plan? Not always.

Some of the greatest products started as ideas that just evolved over time.

You’re not a details person.

Neither am I.

So look at the big picture, and find a “details” person.

Between the two of you, you’ll see the overall journey, and the little steps to take to get there.

You’re not a big picture person.

Totally understand, not everyone is.

But you’re vital to the execution of any plan.

If you don’t see the big picture, find someone does; and rule the world together.

Your best ideas escape you.

Notebooks, smart phones, voice recorders, and napkins are wonderful tools for idea trapping.

Capture your best ideas, and revisit them later.

You will train yourself to better distinguish the good ideas from the bad, and your ideas will improve over time.

It’s amazing how much stuff you retain once you take the simple step of writing it all down.

You can’t commit to a schedule/calendar/ etc.

I’ve used this way more than I should.

First, Failure to commit to a schedule condemns your days to be cannibalized.

Second, when you’re successful, people want a piece of your time, all the time.

Your “schedule” doesn’t have to be super segmented. Just plan for some “production only” time, if you want to get anything done.

Without a schedule, you’ll find you’re often double booked, which makes you look terribly silly and unprofessional.

You’re a better thinker than a doer.

This excuse enable’s you to be lazy.

Do something, anything.

Take action on your ideas, or stop talking about them.

If it gets people pumped, it’s viable.

So do it.

Otherwise, stop getting our hopes up.

You’re a better doer than a thinker.

Every thinker needs someone to keep pushing them forward.

If you’re a better doer, find a visionary and collaborate.

There are too many great ideas, and not enough people to execute.

Find a great idea, then help it move forward.

While you’re at it, motivate the “thinker” to start doing stuff too.

You don’t have the certification/ credentials.

Sometimes it’s an obstacle. Mostly it’s just a cop out.

Employers asking for certification are really looking for the piece of paper that proves your dedication.

If you lack proper certification, but know you’re the most qualified, stop at nothing to get yourself in the door.

If it’s important to you, and you’re that good, get certified.

Go to the institution you need, ask about the prerequisite programs for certification.

Then take all the final tests.

You’re not creative enough.

Not everything needs to be creative.

Sometimes there’s so much creative crap, all the world needs is cut and dry information.

Not everyone responds to creative and there’s always a need for black and white information.

If you need creativity, find an “ideas” person. They’ll know a creative person.

Too many obstacles.

Tell me one epic story in which the protagonist doesn’t overcome too many obstacles.

To save the princess, you must travel the land, sail the ocean, answer the riddles of the old man at the bridge, and bring an offering to the king.

Only then can you slay the dragon.

It’s going to be difficult, but trust me, the princess (your freedom) is worth it.

You tried before and failed.

Dust yourself off, pick yourself up, and do it again.

Obviously you can’t go about it the same way, so find a new angle.

If it’s important to you, realize defeat is temporary.

With every loss, you gain the experience you need to win.

Your idea is too far ahead of it’s time.

If the technology doesn’t exist, and you’ve done the research to verify that, chances are, you’re lying.

This excuse is given by pretentious lazy people.

Timing is important of course. If your idea really is “too far ahead of it’s time,” prepare the market, and be ready to launch at the right time.

You’re too creative & nobody understands you.

Learn to be a better communicator. Stop thinking so highly of yourself.

When people can’t understands you, you’re either a bad communicator or talking to the wrong people, or both.

There are more unmotivated creatives than the world knows what to do with.

Creative and driven on the other hand… now that’s a rare combination.

You don’t have a website.

There was a time businesses existed before the internet.

No matter the industry (including online marketing) websites are only tools , not the business itself.

You don’t have a good website.

Believe it or not, there are plenty of businesses who are still profitable with terrible websites.

Counter intuitive, I know. But it’s true.

If your website needs a redesign, hire someone to redesign it.

If it’s a matter of money, look back at excuse number 4.

If it doesn’t really require a redesign, stop making excuses and start moving forward.

Your customers aren’t on [insert platform of choice]

My customers aren’t on Facebook. My customers don’t watch Youtube. My customers don’t use Twitter. My customers don’t have a phone. My customers don’t get snail mail. My customers don’t watch television. My customers don’t shop at that store. My customers don’t drive on that highway. My customers aren’t human. My customers don’t breathe air.

You’re not doing enough to learn about your customers.

You don’t want to spend too much time away from the family.

This is another one of those really sensitive excuses.

Obviously (hopefully) if you have a family, you don’t want to leave them for long periods of time.

If you can, make arrangements for them to come with you, or find ways to attend long distance events virtually.

If virtual isn’t an option, be sure to keep an open line of communication, and make every effort to stay connected.

When you return home, commit to distraction free family time.

Explore all of your options, and don’t hide behind your family as an excuse to get out of something you don’t want to do.

You can’t until you have _______.

Money, desk, tools, website, secretary, bank account, more influence or any other number of outside factors.

Make every attempt to acquire the bare essentials quickly.

Plot out your steps and create milestones.

Missions and objectives do wonders for progress.

You don’t have the proper thinking space.

Find it.

Go for walk. Listen to music. Go outside. Go inside. Hide in the shower. Hang out under your bed.

If you really need the perfect thinking space, learn how to meditate.

Then no matter where you are, you’re always in the right place.

You need absolute silence.

Noise cancelling headphones: $29, Soundproof earmuffs: $26.95, Earplugs: $0.10.

The piece of mind that comes from uninterrupted work: Priceless

You need more noise.

Fire up Pandora, go to the coffee shop, or listen to this collection of background noises. That should be more than enough to get you in the proper head space.

If you want to be more productive, listen to any number of the webinar replays collecting dust in your inbox, or re-listen to paid training you’ve taken in the past.

You don’t have the right words.

There’s no such thing as “the right words,” only the wrong people.

If you didn’t have “the right words” the people closest to you wouldn’t be able stand you for more than 5 minutes at a time.

Maybe you are an unfortunate soul that nobody can stand talking to, but it’s unlikely.

Stop searching for “the right words”, be exactly who you are.

Of course, learning how to structure headlines, format posts, and write killer closings doesn’t ever hurt though.

You’re too tired.

Put yourself on a schedule, structure your day, and get more rest.

If necessary (and possible) take naps when you can, and remain productive.

Productivity sparks energy.

If you’re chronically tired, improve your fitness, and increase your vitamin intake.

Sometimes a vitamin supplement is necessary, and sometimes you need to suck it up and get it done.

If you do this, what else do you have to do?

Whatever comes next, but you’ll never know until you start making progress.

You can’t stop doing [unproductive habit]

Every day is a choice.

That doesn’t mean it’s easy, in fact it can be quite difficult.

But you choose to smoke, you choose to eat unhealthy foods, you choose spend 10 hours a week on Youtube, and $1 a day on lottery tickets.

Breaking habits isn’t easy, but it is doable, especially when you start looking at everything as a choice.

Last year I quit smoking and now I’m cutting back on caffeine. I choose to drink water over Coca Cola.

Granted cutting back on bad habits don’t appear to make a huge difference at first.

But saving $7 a day on cigarettes, and $1.69 on soda, and using that $60.83 a week for paid ads has been a more positive use of the same money.

It just doesn’t “feel” right.

Instinct or excuse?

Does it not “feel” right because it really isn’t right for you, or is it simply not convenient?

Be honest, say you don’t want to.

Don’t blame your instinct. Eventually your instinct will go cold, and your gauge for “good” and “bad” will disappear.

An entrepreneur’s deadliest weapon is instinct, so keep your’s sharp.

Don’t blame it for things you don’t want to do.

You did everything you could.

Did you really?

Did you see where you went wrong?

Try again.

Who knows, you might be successful next time.

But the other guy…

…yeah? What are they doing?

Why you watching them make moves and not making your own?

Furthermore, are they watching you? Are you doing anything worth watching?

You’re just not Chris Brogan.

Or Brian Clark, or Sonia Simone, or Jon Morrow.

These names only have weight because they hustled to make sure you remembered them.

No you’re not Chris Brogan, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be influential.

In fact, Chris and Brian and Sonia and Jon all give advice that will help you do just that.

Start taking action on the stuff they’re talking about and pay attention to their business models, then adapt it to yourself.

You’re just not confident enough.

Confidence is a learned behavior.

A long time ago someone told me to repeat to myself “I am the Sh*t” 100 times a day.

Eventually, I started to believe it. There’s a ton of advice on how to be more confident.

You might also take comfort in knowing that 99% of online persona’s are text and images. If you need to create a character to be more comfortable, be who you want, (just be careful not to lie to yourself)

You’re not a leader.

It’s not as black and white as “Leaders” and “Followers”.

Every leader needs a B-team, so even if you’re not the face at the front, you can still lead the people behind them.

A president doesn’t become president all on their own, there are always people leading the charge that get them to office.

You don’t like to be lead.

So you don’t work well under someone else? Me either. In fact, I am terrible at it.

Want to know the truth?

Sometimes “being lead” is exactly what you need to advance..

Think about it.

Someone with more experience can show you the way. Don’t you think it’s worth telling your inner rebel take a back seat?

You quit once already, you couldn’t possibly try the same thing again.

Shame is a powerful opponent, but it’s all in your head.

Even if people tell you your nuts for trying again, go for it.

If you really believe, who are you to let your past failures dictate your future victories?

Yes, you quit before, you didn’t have the knowledge or experience you do now.

This time will be different, but don’t you dare give up.

You don’t have a support system.

Been there, and it’s hard no doubt.

The reality is, if you’re perusing something you truly believe in, give it everything you’ve got.

Fight with every ounce of your being and every fiber in your body.

Your support system will appear.

Others rally for ideas they believe in, and the people who champion them.

Show the world you refuse to accept defeat, and the world will give you the support you need to continue.

You don’t have a plan B.

All the reason to fight more.

Fallback plans are for those who plan to fail.

Truth is, “Plan B” is usually better mapped out than “Plan A”.

It’s no wonder it also usually works out better.

You can’t compete with big names.

If you can’t compete, collaborate.

If you can’t collaborate, discover what their customers hate, then do that better.

You might not go toe to toe, but you can do small portions of their business better.

You don’t want to start another thing you’ll never finish.

Say no, or schedule it for when you can see it through from start to finish.

Commit.

Don’t stop until you’re done.

And be sure to reward yourself when the task is complete.

Your friends/family will think you’re crazy.

If your friends/family think you are crazy, you’re likely to have a good idea on your hands.

The world was made on experimentation. If everyone’s loved ones understood all the insane ideas people come up with, we’d never have innovation.

It’s too selfish.

What’s more selfish; not helping people with a problem because you think it’s too selfish, or making money for solving a problem?

You don’t deserve it.

You’re right, you don’t.

You earn it.

Rewards that come from hard and smart work you absolutely earned though.

Remember to always enjoy the benefits of your success.

You don’t know what your passion is.

Understandable. Not everyone is there, yet.

However if you want to do something, you just can’t figure out what, go to the bookstore and see what section you gravitate towards.

If you cook a lot, start a cooking website or a Youtube channel. If you’re religious, document an exploration of your faith.

Do some soul searching to determine what you’ll forever be passionate about.

Write about that.

You can’t think of a niche.

Next time you’re at the bookstore, spend some time flipping through the magazine rack. You’ll find all sorts of niches that are ripe with readers.

If there wasn’t a market, there wouldn’t be a magazine.

You deserve a break.

Only if you’ve reached an acceptable goal for yourself.

If you’re not hitting your marks, you haven’t deserved anything.

If you want to say “BUT I’m tired…!” see I’m tired further up on this page.

You do enough.

See above.

The “timing” isn’t right.

Market timing and personal timing are important.

If the timing doesn’t coordinate with your personal life, find time in your schedule when it is.

If the timing isn’t right for the marketplace, help push the market forward towards the “right time”.

This could mean exposing new problems, pushing competitors to innovate, or releasing products that support a bigger idea.

Obviously you don’t want to scare people, so getting them gradually prepared can make them more receptive and likely to buy.

You don’t work well on a team.

You’ll only going to get so far on your own.

At some point if you want to “level up” you’ll have to work on a team.

Online entrepreneurs are especially guilty of having the “I have to run the show” complex.

But some ideas require many minds to come to fruition.

You’ll have to learn when to compromise, and allows others to show their strengths.

I know it’s tough.

But once you’ve mastered the group dynamic, you’ll wonder how you ever did anything without your team.

Nobody understands what you’re trying to say.

Become a better communicator.

Look for resources on remarkable communication and persuasive writing.

If people still have moths coming out their ears when you talk, record yourself speaking, and play it back.

What we say makes often makes total sense, until we hear it from someone else’s perspective.

There’s nothing you can contribute.

At the very least, your perspective is unique.

Even when you’re covering the same thing as 5,000 others, your perspective makes you valuable.

Learn as much as you can, then share what you’ve learned, in your words.

Apply what you’ve learned, and share your experiences.

These two things are incredibly unique, and if that’s all you can contribute, it’s a much better than doing nothing.

The system has already been perfected.

No it hasn’t. You’re just not pushing it to it’s limits yet.

You’re not saying anything new.

Very few people actually are.

How many copy writing classes are being taught the world over?

How many people do you think are teaching persuasive writing, or headline techniques, or conversion tactics?

Hundreds? Thousands? More?

Yet Copyblogger media is a 5 million a year company, teaching principals that have been taught since the 1920′s.How is that?

Even if you’re not saying anything new, your experience, your perspective, and most important, your personality come together to develop something worth watching.

It’s nothing they haven’t heard before.

People are learning new things every day.

If you’re showing up in the searches for what they’re looking for, you might be the one to change their life.

You can’t teach something if it’s common sense.

Common sense is in short supply these days.

What is intrinsic to you is the bane of someone else’s existence.

No you can’t teach common sense, but you can teach what you know.

Be patient with your customers. If they don’t “get it” open the dialog and really listen to them one on one.

It may turn out that you’re not communicating clearly.

You learned ______ before, you can’t learn anything different.

Cop out.

Pick it up and learn it. If it’s counter to what you learned before, see if you can integrate approaches.

If not, decide which paradigm is more suitable to you.

You can learn anything at any time, regardless to what you’ve learned before.

Be a little more flexible, otherwise you’ll just end up broken.

You’re too old.

No you’re not.

Age and willingness to learn only go hand in hand if you let them.

Your life experience gives you a valuable perspective that many others might not bring to the table.

You’re too young.

No you’re not.

Age and willingness to learn only go hand in hand if you let them.

Your youth allows you to see things from a fresh perspective that the older generation may have missed.

Let your youth be more most valuable weapon, not something that holds you back.

You don’t understand [insert platform of choice here]

Google.com will do wonders for finding resources to help you with that.

I’m no good at [ insert platform of choice here]

See above.

By the time I get there, the industry will have changed.

So don’t take forever.

Keep up with the current industry while learning the founding principals.

This is almost always the best way to break in. When so many people are focused on doing advanced strategies, that they forget the basic principals (which often times work the best).

Document your journey from the starting point and share what you’re learning.

Network and ask a lot of questions.

Whether you realize it or not, you just might be helping the industry shift by doing these few simple things.

You’ll never catch up.

Don’t worry about it. Just do. Focus on doing.

“You are in the middle of your day today, and you’re caught up in the sandstorm of thoughts, feelings, to-dos, meetings, readings, and communications of this day.

Pause. Breathe. Let all of that fade.

Now focus on doing one thing, right now.”

~Leo Babauta zenhabits.net

 

You don’t have time.

Seriously? You just read (or at least scrolled through) 106 excuses, 106 debunks and nearly 7,000 words. You have time.

In fact, you have all the time, resources, and knowledge required to be great.

Being great, no, being excellent, is a choice.

It’s a choice to never stop. It’s a choice to view yourself as limitless. It’s a choice to stop at nothing until everyone knows your name.

Without a doubt, you’ll encounter many obstacles on your journey. That’s a given.

So what are you waiting for?

Go.

Be great.

Overcome your obstacles, or make excuses; it’s as simple as that.

Death and Taxes

Have I mentioned Dave Ramsey, before?   Of course, I’ve mentioned him.  Sometimes after I’ve finished bowing to Steve Jobs in the East, I turn and bow to Dave in the South.  I even listen to his podcasts from time to time.  Unheard of.

In all seriousness, you could say Dave Ramsey is pretty awesome.  He’s funny, makes sense and mostly exceeded my expectations.  So I’ve taken quite a few of his financial planning lessons to heart.  Like diversifying my portfolio.  Sounds cool right?  Aside from hopefully making more money on my investments, more importantly is the fact I actually understand what that even means now.  I used to plug my ears at the mere mention of a portfolio because I had no idea what was being said.   

Thanks to Dave, I’m also making better decisions.  Like for example, why spend $20 on a dress that I don’t really really want, when I could save my money and buy the dress I REALLY want – maybe even on sale.  Novel concept.  Or wait, maybe even buy a refurbished product.  What?!?  I know, I shocked myself with that decision.  Of course I don’t always make the right decision, but it’s a start.

The other thing I took to heart was Estate Planning.  That’s right, we now have Life Insurance AND a will.  All that to say that not only do I feel more responsible, but suddenly I feel more mortal.  I’m not sure what I was expecting.  Maybe I thought I would get bit by a vampire and live forever.  That’s what you get when you read Twilight too many times.  Thank goodness I haven’t been watching Shawn of the Dead, otherwise my fate would be less romanticized and more gross zombie takeover.

I’m pretty sure I would rather be this…

Than this…

Gross, right?

Of course, that’s all make-believe.  The reality is we have Life Insurance AND  a Will now.  All this on a Tuesday, much too close to Monday.  I think I’m going to have to buy a new pair of shoes soon to lessen the blow to my mortality.  Sorry Dave Ramsey.

Mood Changer

I woke up Sunday to our 3 year old demanding I get out of bed.  It amazes me that the same little person that will hide under covers so as not to have to wake up has little to no patience when I don’t just jump out of bed.  Geez.

Note to self – I really should go to bed earlier so I can have a decent amount of time to wake up on my own terms.

So you could say that Sunday morning didn’t quite start off as expected.  It didn’t get much better.  Nothing tragic or dramatic, just not a lazy day with lots of down time.  For some reason, I found myself in an increasingly bad mood.  Short tempered.  In general not pleasant to be around.  On a side note, the Women’s National Soccer Team was playing Brazil.  It’s not a game I had planned to watch, but suddenly I found myself annoyed that I couldn’t watch the game uninterrupted.

So when the going gets tough and I can’t take it, I go shopping.  Suddenly the need to organize Lola’s Legos seized me.  Though it wasn’t a complete necessity to organize the Legos at that precise moment, it was better than a clothing shopping spree.  When we came back, the game was still on.  It was overtime, down 1 goal due to some drama.  I sat down, because though I was now slightly more organized, I was still in a bad mood.  Two minutes later, in the 122nd  minute , 1 man down, the perfect cross, Abby Wambach  scores the tying goal.  WHAT?!?  It was insane, unbelivable, a miracle, impossible.  It changed the game.  It changed my mood.  A total shift.  Bad mood gone.  Seriously.

There’s something about this game.  It’s so hard.  No, really.  It’s not as easy as it looks scoring a goal or stopping a goal for that matter.   There are so many influencing factors – the field, the other team, the refs, the goal keeper, your shoe, the ball, the weather, the crazy rules – some of which I may never truly understand (it doesn’t matter how much I learn, I can’t spot offsides to save my life), the list goes on.   Of course these factors influence any sport, but there are so many other things.  Controversy never fails to show up.  A bad call can change the entire game.   There is no turning back once the decision has been made, no instant replay, no coaches disputing the play.  The cards fall where they may.  It can be a total injustice, but the game goes on.  And good or bad it draws you in – heart and soul.

It was also a mood changer to see this game I love played by women.  I know.  You might be thinking; Great.  Womens’ lib.  Feminism and all that.  Yes, it makes me happy to see women just like me (ok, women that play better – much better –  but in large part just like me) victorious in a game I’ve come to love.  It was freaking awesome people.

I must confess, until today, I’ve never really watched our women’s soccer game and I’m pretty sure watching Lola during Soccer Tots or watching Bend it Like Beckham over 20 times doesn’t really count.  Not sure what possessed me today – I think I needed a distraction, but I got so much more.  It’s amazing the impact of watching someone do something beyond themself, beyond what you thought was possible, in many ways a fairytale come true.